Babe, sorry for what happened. Oo alam ko mali ako. Sobrang mali ako. Naging insensitive ako ng sobra. Hindi ko alam kung bakit ako ganto. Immature ko, sobra. Mahal na mahal mo ko pero lagi nalang kita nasasaktan in many ways. You might think that I’m the worst and non sense girlfriend. Ok lang babe, I feel the same way. Wala akong kwentang girlfriend cos I kept on hurting you. Tanggap ko naman yun. Lahat ng ayaw mo, nagagawa ko. Though alam kong ikakagalit and ikakasama sa relationship natin, I’m still doing it.

Di ko alam kung bakit ganto ako mag isip. Ang selfish ko. I don’t know how to appreciate things. Lagi kitang nasasaktan. Babe, nasasaktan din ako everytime na sinasaktan kita. Ang bullshit noh. Doble dobleng sakit sayo ng mga ginagawa ko. And I know I don’t deserve your love. You love me so much. Kahit na ang sama sama ko, nagtyatyaga ka. Babe, I love you as well, but I don’t know how to show you and give you what you expect from me.

Ang tanga tanga ko. I don’t know how to handle a relationship. Ang bata ko lang siguro mag isip. Alam mo namang first love kita e. I do entertain boys but I’d never love a guy like this. Sayo lang ako nagkaganto. Mahal na mahal kita babe, pero sinasaktan kita. Fuck. I don’t know what you call that love! Pwede pala yun noh. Magmahal ka ng isang tao, pero nasasaktan mo.

For sure, galit na galit ka sakin and you don’t want to see me. That’s how I know you babe. Pero I just wanna say sorry. Sorry for everything. Sorry kung nasasaktan kita. Sorry kung ang bitch ko.

Ang swerte ko sayo babe. Inaalagaan mo ko. You’re treating me like a princess every time I’m with you. And ang stupid ko cos I’m not returning back the things you do to me. Ayaw mo na? Sige babe, I’ll respect your decision. Pero stick in your mind na I’m still here.

Thank you for being such a good boyfriend to me. I can’t ask for more because you’ve showed me the best that you can be. Pinakita mo sakin lahat ng dapat, tinuruan mo ako, you’re the best boyfriend and bestfriend. Nagsisisi ako sa lahat ng nagawa ko sayong mali. Pero wala na. It’s too late. Nagawa ko na eh. Nagawa ko na mga bagay na ikakasakit mo. Ang gago ko! Bobo ko kasi bakit sa lahat ng pwede kong saktan, yung taong mahal ko pa at mahal ako ng sobra. Fuck that!

Alam kong nagsisisi ka kasi nagka girlfriend ka ng kagaya ko, pero babe, believe me or not, I’m so thankful having you in my life and I’ll never regret loving you. Kung may pagsisisihan man ako ay yun ung mga bagay na nagawa kong mali sayo. I’ll accept the fact na sumuko ka na sakin. Deep inside, oo, masakit. Pero wala na akong magagawa. Wala akong karapatan mag decision satin. Kung meron man, ikaw un. Sobra sobrang sakit ang mga nagawa ko sayo. Wala akong mukhang maiharap sayo. Sobrang kapal ng mukha ko sa mga nagawa ko.

Being sorry isn’t enough to take away your anger cos forgiveness does not change the past. Pero people do change babe. If you give me another/last chance, I’ll show you the different Mara in a good way. I’ve learned a lot. Sobrang dami ko natutunan in our relationship and sayo. You taught me everything. Hindi ko alam bat di ko yun pinakinggan lahat. But now, I learned how to love and to be loved. And that’s all because of you babe.

I love you so much. SORRY FOR EVERYTHING Kurt. :(

—- Mara Payumo, (KJLN24)